Thursday, November 29, 2012

The "Mommy's Shower Law"

You know how Murphy's Law states that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong?  Well, this Mommy has come to a conclusion that I'm certain moms the world over will confirm.  I like to call it the "Mommy's Shower Law."  It states that if kids will do something crazy, it is going to happen as soon as Mommy steps foot in the shower.
As mothers, we know no matter how short we keep it, whether it be as brief as washing hair and body in the same length of time it takes our spouses to get the water adjusted right, or as luxuriously long as allowing time to actually shave one leg, SOMETHING is going to happen!
I've tried to outsmart the Mommy's Shower Law with all sorts of tricks and techniques....plug the children into a movie (yep, the show is going to stall), let them play electronics (most likely the battery will go dead), sneak it while they sleep (you know a doorbell is gonna ring)....the list goes on and on.
How bad can it get, some naive reader may which I laugh, Hahahaha!!!  Let's see...maybe I should tell of the time my little sprite thought it the perfect moment to leap onto the couch, slip off, and break her arm.  Or maybe I should delve into the time scissors were discovered and a sister's hair was given the "layered" look, very short layered look.  Nah, I think I'll share with you the legendary burnt popcorn story.
Once upon a time, all of my minions were calm and in their wide-eyed zombie state entranced by their favorite cartoon.  It should have been safe to grab a quick shower, right?!  However, as the water heated, Little Bit got a sudden craving for popcorn, but since Mommy's Shower was running she knew she could heat it up in the microwave herself.  Little did she know that one extra zero added to the time of 2 minutes would cause smoke to bellow from the kitchen.  Since the emergency rule of the house is "Meet at the mailbox in case of fire," Baby Girl took off sprinting outside, leaving the front door wide open  As I am obliviously in the first step of "lather, rinse, repeat," the door bursts open to blood curdling screams of chaos.  Leaping from the shower and yanking a towel around me to accompany me on the latest adventure, I run out to find the front door wide open, the neighbors agape at what the crazy homeschoolers are up to this morning, and flames lighting up the microwave.  We all survived, the burnt black once recognizable ball of crust was thrown into the sink and the fire put out,  Baby Girl was allowed back inside the house, the cartoon was finished, and I was able to rinse out the first layer of lather.  But to this day, every wiff of popcorn or every swing of the yellow stained microwave door sends me a reminder that Mommy's Shower Law is in fact valid and true.  There is no escaping it.
So, what's the solution? I'm not sure if it will work, but I'm gonna try Baths!  :-)

And yes...that would be soda...on my her pajamas....sigh!!!

Sunday, November 18, 2012


After wrestling and struggling with a difficult challenge, my eldest mourned, "I just don't understand why!  Why me?!  Why this?!"  How many times have I looked to the heavens and asked these very words.  It's not a new question, but the answer is one which I constantly need reminding.

As a parent, I can tell you, I allow my children to be tried and face challenges because I know they can handle them, learn from them, and grow into a stronger person.  I know, I know...what trials does a little child have, right?!  True, they may not seem extreme or life changing...those pesky 7 times tables, that challenge of approaching a possible new friend and making conversation, putting the right shoe on the right foot.  I can see the end result coming, a smooth road just around the corner for them, but from their perspective these are HUGE.  They can call to me to help, and sometimes I run to assist because I see they truly need me, and other times I stand back, encouraging them from afar, watching them learn to succeed.

As a child of God, I question, I struggle, and I'll admit it--sometimes I flounder, questioning, "Why?!"  What trials do I face?  To me they seem extreme and life changing.  From my perspective they are HUGE.  But from His???  I call to Him for help, and sometimes He is clearly right there assisting me, and then other times where is He?  Standing back, encouraging me from afar, watching me learn to succeed?  I pray He finds us growing and that thru these "houses of mourning" we can see that these trials are here as a stepping stone to something much, much greater.